Brothers & Sisters

I was watching Season 2 of Brothers & Sisters last night til really late. This morning when Lucas came looking for me, I thought it was still night (when it was actually early morning but because our electric shutters do not allow even a smidgen of light through, its all dark in the apartment and one can easily lose track of time that way) and brought him into our bed for more sleep. Before I know it, Fred hops out of bed and told me its 11.15 in the morning!!!! We had a wonderful sleep in, and are feeling rested and happy :)

Anyway, back to the series - being a mother, I worry that Lucas will grow up all alone. For sure, he will not have any first cousins here as Gilles will not be getting married or having any kids. And as I watch the series with envy (because to me that's exactly how a family should be, full of support and love and close camaraderie and that's what I want for Lucas) I find myself wishing things could be different.
I grew up in a dysfunctional family and I do not want that for Lucas at all. But I now realize that, what I cannot get from my family, I get it in abundance from my friends. My friends have become my family. I realized that during my last trip home - I am indeed lucky to have my cousin Allan, and most importantly I have really, really good friends who are true.

But for Lucas, who will grow up here in France, he will only have Fred & I and his grandma. Fred is also from a dysfunctional family of sorts (its proven that one from a dysfunctional family inadvertently attracts the same) and is not close to his cousins at all - his aunt lives less than 30 minutes away from us and we see her once a year, so for Lucas to meet up with his cousins once a year is not good enough to build a strong bond.
I would like Lucas to have childhood friends like I have, where years can pass with us not seeing each other yet when we meet again, we are still close and its as if no time have passed at all!

I wish we could give him a sibling or two or even three to grow up with but time is not on our side. If we can afford it I would have liked to adopt another child. But for now, I am glad that Lucas has gotten back into contact with his best buddy from the garderie, Plume and he has his 2 constant friends Matheo & Ixchel to play with.

Lucas @ 38 months

I found out that taking Lucas out of school for a whole month was a terrible idea even though he is just in the petit section at school, he has missed out on a lot and when he got back to school again in November, Lucas has had to readjust himself and start everything new as he'd forgotten everything he'd learnt in September.

Fred & I had a chat with his teacher and found that while Lucas is great when it comes to one on one interaction, he is lost in a group. The teacher also told me that as a parent I have been too indulgent and with Lucas I need to set strict boundaries and not give in at all. He needs to spend time by himself, and not be with me 24/7. To distance myself a bit, we decided to leave Lucas in school for lunch last week.

The first day, he was confused and asked for me repeatedly; didn't eat anything but bread in the canteen. On our second try, Lucas ate absolutely nothing at all and threw a mother of a tantrum in the canteen. When I went to pick him up after school, the teacher says we should try another day. So, on our third try, Lucas didn't eat anything (as usual, he doesn't eat much at home either) but this time there was no tantrum.

In the past week and a half, we have also noticed differences in Lucas - he has started to listen more; he definitely understands when we talk to him and he is now differentiating his languages when he speaks to me, his papa and his teachers. I also noticed that he is picking up french very quickly.

Last Wednesday, for the first time I was able to sweep, vacuum and mop the whole apartment, clean the bathroom and cook lunch without having Lucas underfoot! I told him to stay in his room and play, which he did. Periodically, I would check in and find him singing and playing at the same time.

While we are still having problems getting Lucas to go to sleep at night, he's been sleeping in his bed throughout the night the past 2 nights. Yesterday he didn't come to our bed at all.

At 38 months, Lucas loves Dora The Explorer, Pat the Postman, Oui Oui, Handy Manny and Chloe Magique. He loves balloons and bubbles, he now refuses to pee into his diapers at night (yes he still wears diapers to sleep) and he's still asking for ice cream no matter how cold it is! He is also fascinated by falling snow, he likes to taste the snow and he likes to pretend he is a cat at home, playing under the dining table and eating without hands...

Lucas is now on Christmas holidays for 2 weeks, going back to school early January. He is asking for Eliane (the teacher's assistant in his class) everyday and wakes up thinking he will go to school. Its a shame that when he is making so much progress we have to have a break from school but then there is always January to look forward to.... :)

Public again

This blog has been made public once again - In the many months before someone who didn't like (or could not accept) what I said about him and decide to go crying to mommy, when it was public I have made many friends through this blog and I decided that its just not worth hiding anymore; I'd rather take out that one post and continue to meet new friends through my blog.

December in photos

Before the snowfall

Our tree is finally up!

paper wreath made from recycled wrapping paper & my 2008 Starbucks diary

Sleep and nursery rhymes

Lucas has been having sleeping problems since we got back from Malaysia, but things took a turn for the worst 2 weeks ago when he would not even want to sleep in his room anymore. Before that, he would fall asleep in his room, call for me in the middle of the night, sometimes 3 to 4 times a night to sit with him til he falls back asleep again. Then he started to come over to our bed, but mostly its around 6 am, so I let him sleep with us for another 2 hours. 2 weeks ago, his 6 am wake up call started to become 4 am, and then 2 am and then midnight. He would climb into our bed to sleep.

So I decided to put a stop to it and put up the barriers in his bed so he could not climb out without me. It worked for 2 nights, but he would call out to me to sit with him. Then on the 3rd night, he appeared next to me at 3 am in the morning and whispered "mama"... He'd managed to climb out of his cot. I put him back into his bed (screaming and crying) and 5 minutes later, he's back.

A few nights ago, I was so exhausted that when Lucas came looking for me in the middle of the night I told him that there is no place in the bed for him, and he has to go back to his bed to sleep or else he can sleep on the cold floor. I repeated it 4 times and then he finally climbed onto Fred and fell asleep on top of his papa.

Last night though, at 6 am, he didn't call out to me, he just crept into our room, stood looking at me for a second, then he walked to the end of the bed and started to lie down on the floor! I waited with baited breath and it really looked as if he was going to sleep on the floor! So I called out to him and he climbed into the bed with us.

So that incident is proof that he does listen AND he does understand fully what we tell him, but Lucas and his selective listening has gotten him into many spots in the naughty chair at school. In fact everyone in his class knows him and calls his name, but when I ask Lucas about names of his friends at school, he stays mum. We are starting to worry about his speech and have considered sending Luc to an orthophonist to help him. However, while Lucas doesn't speak to us as fluently as we'd like (he is bi-lingual after all, and he also watches cartoons in Korean, Japanese, Italian and Spanish) he does sing fluently in English and Korean! The words are clear and precise when he sings, although his "Twinkle, twinkle little star" is a bit off key sometimes :)

Lucas sings Humpty Dumpty, Wheels on a bus, Incy Wincy Spider, 1-2-3-4-5 Buzz Buzz, Barney's Mr. Sun and his 2 favourite rhymes are Snail, Snail and This little piggy...

Lucas still peppers his speech with made up words, my guess is he doesn't know the words but wants to speak, so he just makes up words! But he is repeating things we say, and is catching up fast with new words. His teacher at school says Lucas doesn't recognize his own name, but we beg to differ. Lucas has this annoying habit of ignoring his teacher when she wants him to do something he doesn't want to do. Which is stressful for me as well because everytime I pick him up from school, the teacher complains that Lucas doesn't listen.

I am trying out the Shichida 5 minute suggestion to see if I can get him to coorperate and listen. I started just 2 nights ago, and will update you all on this method if it works!

Jake Gyllenhaal

I just watched Prince of Persia - Sands of Time. And none was more surprised than I to see Jake in the role of Prince Dastan! I really could not believe my eyes when I saw him, I was talking to myself "looks like Jake Gyllenhaal, but nah.... cannot be la, not the same Jake Gyllenhaal from Brokeback and Zodiac???!!!!!"

But I quickly checked online and yes! it is Jake Gyllenhaal. He got all buffed up for the role AND speaks with a Brit accent.
*sigh* I never thought the day would come when I find myself saying this - that Jake Gyllenhaal is HOT!!!!

Bully

I think I did a little boo-boo today :(

There is this angelic looking blonde boy in Lucas' class who is downright mean to Lucas, everytime he sees Lucas. When Lucas wanted to go play with him, he would start "shooting" at Lucas, with full sound effects and runs around Lucas shooting at him. A few times he'd shouted that Lucas is not my friend!

So this afternoon when I dropped Lucas off at school and we were walking in through the gates, along comes this boy and his younger brother and his pregnant mom. Lucas is happily walking to his class, minding his own business when this blondie comes running to Lucas with his brother and he starts his irritating "shooting" sounds again. His mother doesn't seem to care and since they didn't touch Lucas I didn't say anything, even though I was annoyed.

Then, his younger brother suddenly ran forward and with both hands pushed Lucas! My reflex reaction was to raise my voice and say "hey! stop!". All the mother did was pull her son off and gave me a dirty look, like I should not have shouted at her bully of a son.

Should I not have shouted? Should I have smacked that little twerp instead? His own mother doesn't seem to think that he's done anything wrong... Am I being over protective here?

KL and beyond Part 2

Since our trip back to KL, I found that a lot has changed in the past 2 years. KL is more expensive than what I remember, I find that I no longer tolerate traffic jams, the taxis that Lucas and I took are clean and now go by meters though I have to say the meters have surely been tampered with - a one way trip from IKEA back to KLCC cost me RM32.

One thing is for sure - I miss my friends back in KL. I miss hanging out with them, attending dinner parties, going out, watching movies or just the leisurely coffee.
In KL, after we left Grace's, I was feeling a bit unsettled - its not the same when you don't have your own place to go back to. I miss having my own car and my own apartment in KL.
I even miss the thought of going to work, getting all dressed up and ready to face the day.

Lucas' sleep routine went back to normalcy within the first week we got back to France, except now, he wants to sleep with us in our bed. But his sleep hours are fine.
Lucas has also started to attend afternoon classes at school. So now, every morning I send him to school at 9am, pick him up at noon for lunch, then send him back to school at 2pm and pick him up at 5pm.
It was a hard first week, as he was adjusting to going back to school and he also had an infection under his foreskin which hurt; Lucas also would not nap in school during his afternoon class and I was told by his teacher that if he doesn't nap, Lucas cannot attend the afternoon class anymore.
By some miracle, Lucas actually started napping on his 2nd afternoon class. So now he is more adjusted.
I've noticed that in the past couple of days he would disappear into his room to read. He still comes running for a "big hug" but he is not as clingy anymore.

I am still having problems feeding him vegetables - he refuses to touch them! But Lucas is now eating apples, yoghurt and steak hache (hamburger meat). I try to give him a variety but it takes a long time for Lucas to eat something new. He still loves his chicken nuggets, french fries, fish fingers, macaroni and pesto and he eats chunks of cheese. His chocolate intake has been cut down to a chocolate cookie for school and his chocolate milk. Since KL, he has stopped taking his bottle of milk before bed.

As for potty training, I managed to get him to do his ka-ka in the toilet twice before he regressed and asked for his beloved pampers again... Nowadays he uses his pampers only at night (or when he needs to "go"). And I have started putting him on the potty before he goes to sleep to try to get him ready to go without his diapers when he sleeps at night. So far he still pees into his pull ups at night.

Lucas in Bali

At HRC Bali with Nyoman

He loves his chicken crispers!

With nanny Anita

With Aunty Eva & Kieran at Tirtha Chapel

In his Bali Bintang singlet, checking out the handicraft in Kuta

At the lobby of The Istana

Trying to fly his kite

Still trying...

With the locals in a Bali sidewalk

KL and beyond part 1

Its been over 6 weeks since I last blogged, except for the previous one on Lucas' 3rd birthday. In case some of you do not know, Lucas & I have been away for a month, and although we have been back in rainy & cold Tarbes for the past 2 weeks now, I am still feeling out of sorts and maybe a little jet lagged...

On the day Lucas & I left Toulouse for Amsterdam & KL, we'd heard that there was going to be a strike at the airport. Lucky for us we were booked on KLM and could check in online AND choose our seats online 30 hours before departure which was exactly what we did. BTW this route is perfect, the departure time from TLS to AMS is late evening and then we immediately board onto another flight to KL (only an hour's wait at Schipol).

I made a mistake thinking we had a 4 hour wait at Schipol. On top of that I also left my stroller at the cityhopper plane (we had to catch a bus to the main airport) AND lost our boarding passes. After getting all of that sorted out, we had 30 minutes to run to the gates and board the plane to KL! I'd only realize I made that mistake about the 4 hour wait after I got issued the 2nd set of boarding passes.

It was a full, full flight and the seats we got were non reclinable :(

Lucas was too amped up to settle down and sleep so it was a bit difficult the first 4 hours but he finally slept til the plane landed in KL.

The first thing that hit me when my cousin picked us up from KLIA was the heat! In KL, Lucas & I were taking one shower after another because we would literally start perspiring the minute we got out of the shower!

I had planned to stay with friends who have invited us, but in the end we stayed put at Grace & Duncan's. Lucas fell in love with both Grace and Dunc, calling Grace "mama" several times...!

And the apartment was so convenient and so near to another friend, Theresa's place that Lucas could go "hang out" with his buddies Mikhele & Gio when we were not busy shopping.

We had a wonderful time in KL, spending precious time with friends who, inspite of the distance and time apart, remained true.

Bali started with one disaster - a so called friend who had just moved to Bali invited Lucas & I to stay with her - which was why I booked us tickets to Bali for a whole week. A month before our departure she cancelled on us (!!!) stating that she now has a "villa mate" and it was no longer convenient.

But Lucas & I managed to make the best of our extra time in Bali, thanks to our tour guide extraodinaire, Nyoman. He was not only a taxi driver, he was my meal companion, babysitter (he babysat while I went for my mani & pedi), baby carrier whenever Lucas wanted to be carried, shopping bags carrier, he knew the best places to shop and the best place to have nasi bebek! He was also there for us when we had a spiritual encounter in one of the hotels in Seminyak - Nyoman immediately turned back and came to get us and brought us to another hotel. Before that he tried to get a refund from the hotel for us as well.

For those of you who have asked me many times what I saw, I am not actually supposed to talk about it, so suffice to say a shadow flitting in the shower stall's smoked glass is all I can tell you.

The GM of that hotel apparently moonlights as a bomoh, cos he turned up at my room (Luc & I were waiting outside) with a bag of prayer stuff... He knocked at the door and asked for permission before he entered... And yet he denied that there was anything in that room! In fact, I think the whole hotel is haunted, because the GM changed rooms for us, stated that the room is clean AND safe; then said "but I advise you to sleep with all the lights on" (!!!!)

Anyway, next time any of you are tempted to stay in an authentic Balinese hotel, be careful when booking online. The photos are not what they seem. Honestly you are better off booking a Harris Room at the Harris Hotel. Lucas & I stayed there one night - it comes equipped with a living room, a kitchenette, a king sized bed, a kid's club where you can leave your kids there to play, a kid's pool and fantastic staff! All that, for USD78 a night.



Harris Room



Bedroom at Harris

The best time we had in Bali was of course at The Istana in Uluwatu where June's wedding was held. Lucas & I stayed there 5 days and it was truly paradise! I got Lucas a nanny (AUD45 for 12 hours) and I was able to rest a little and even go to the spa.

MY blog, MY voice

This blog is a place where I express my likes and dislikes, things that make me happy or sad or angry. IF you stumble onto my blog and do not like what you read then simply leave this space!

There is freedom of speech in writing my blog, I have been asked to take out some photos and some names because my blog does not put them in a flattering light - but hey, yes the truth hurts! And if you go through my blog, I write about good and bad about my son too - so much so that my own parents are reluctant to take Lucas with them for even a few days as they have been reading my blog and are scared they cannot handle him. So there. I do not embellish my words. As I've said this blog is where I express myself and is the outlet to my inner most thoughts.

And if you can't handle reading my blog, then do us all a favor and stop reading.

Lucas turns 3

My baby Lucas,

How on earth did three years pass us by already? We celebrated your birthday in Malaysia twice, once at McDonalds in Ipoh and another with all your friends in Aunty Theresa's place. I couldn't help but reflect on the day you came into our lives 3 years ago - You are truly mama's miracle baby and one who brings so much joy to everyone who knows you. You are my little social baby, making friends and endearing yourself to everyone you meet.

This past year, as fast as it flew by has been such a fun one for you. You decided not to wait til you mastered English and French, instead you made up your own language and mixed it with both english and french (with bits of Spanish and Mandarin thrown in...) When you are at home, you are such an easy little boy, especially when your favourite DVD is on, but when you are out in any sort of wide open spaces, the chase is on. Friends, family, neighbors and strangers alike will attest to that. We get lots of comments on your high energy, some a bit patronizing, but we wouldn't change your love for life and the world around you for anything! (But I could really do without the chasing after you part)

Despite of your generally happy nature, you've started making such a fuss everytime we put you in bed for your nap! Its as if you feel like you are missing out on something important everytime you take a nap.

You have visited your naughty corner many times this past year and even though your sentence is only a minute, you show your unhappiness at being punished by crying as loud as you possibly can, and then after a while, you come over for a hug, saying "sorry mama".

Since Malaysia, you have become even more attached to your "lovey" and you are now rediscovering your love of brushing your teeth with toothpaste (though you really should not be swallowing the toothpaste and then asking for more).

You love:

Chocolates (especially ferero rocher & M&Ms peanuts) , pizza, chicken nuggets, fish fingers, ice cream, popcorn, chicken rice, milo, nesquik, peanut butter sandwiches, coconut yoghurt, cheese, pesto in your pasta, cream based spaghetti, Mickey, Thomas, watching "UP", Legos and building blocks, Baby Bright & Sesame Street, balls, balloons, cars, swimming, going for walks, cycling with papa, dancing and listening to music, playgrounds and especially the slides, saucisson and apples, Pororo, Dibo the gift dragon and Barney, bubbles and all animals, including birds, worms, bees and spiders.

You still need your diapers to "do the deed" or you can also do without, in your pants... anywhere but the potty! Your best friend is 4 year old Ixchel. You assert your independance these days by telling me what you want to wear and what you do not want to wear. You seem to prefer the company of adults. You can count 1 to 10- in 3 languages! You can also name colors, shapes and sizes, you recognize numbers and alphabets. You know how to work the TV, DVD player and CD player.

You are full of mischief and endless energy. I thank God everyday for such a wonderful baby, a happy and loving baby like you. You are forever mama's boy :)

September - Lucas @ 35 months

This is the longest I've ever gone without blogging ... what can I say? Life caught up with me; I've been so busy I haven't even had the time to facebook! I thought that with Lucas in school 4 times a week, I'd have more time but I find myself even busier. When Lucas is in school I do the groceries, clean the apartment, do the laundry (not everyday) and then its time to pick Luc and make lunch!

Recently Lucas has been resisting sleep so much he would only nap if I napped with him :)

He would cling onto me so that I could not escape and the slightest movement will stir him from his nap. Today however I managed to get out of bed without waking him and he went on to nap for the full 2 hours.

Ever since Lucas started school, he's been excited about going to school. Yes I am one of the lucky ones, as Lucas doesn't cry unconsolably when I leave him in school. He happily wakes up every morning asking for school. When the school gates open he's running off like the wind towards his classroom. His is one of the first few names remembered by his teachers and Lucas, I am very proud to say is one of the first in his class of 27 to recognize his name written on a laminated card. Every morning every kid has to pick up their names and stick it on the board for roll call. Lucas picked his up by himself the 2nd day at school.

However, when it comes to potty training, he's had 3 accidents in school so far; the last one was a biggie! Luckily he did it in his pants during playtime outside and right after, it was time to go home. I am not sure if his teacher noticed, cos I actually didn't notice anything when I went to pick him, until we got home.

Lucas and I fly off to Malaysia this Saturday, and hopefully he will be fully potty trained by the time he gets back to school after Toussaint.

Lucas' new room

Moving Day

Lucas enjoying the paddle pool on a hot hot day

My 1st "accident" - I found the car "stuck" to mine when I got out of the shops

Child labor!

Lucas & papa, both in PJs

Watering plants - his favourite pastime!