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Thursday, December 31, 2009

home remedy for canker sores

As I was saying, both Lucas and I had a cough. I was looking for home remedies and stumbled on one that suggested I took honey with ginger tea. To make ginger tea, I had to slice fresh ginger and pour hot boiling water over it, cover and wait for a while. Which was what I did... I added a few spoons of the "tea" to Lucas' water (he drinks honey with his milk) and he didn't notice the ginger and drank it all down. For me I was more ambitious - I downed a couple of glasses of the "tea" with honey.
I woke up the next day, so heaty that my lips were cracking and I had 2 canker sores in my mouth - one on the inside of my upper lip and another on the side of my tongue. I haven't had the mouth ulcers in years and now I have to suffer with 2!!!! Its been 3 days now and hurts like hell. Again I decided to look for home remedy - I know.... I never learn.... I wanted to look for something painless besides the old rubbing salt into the ulcer remedy.

I drank coke with salt - it used to work wonders if I was feeling heaty but it didn't work this time. I tried to gargle with salt water. Still painful. I tried to put salt onto the ulcer. Hurt so freaking much, ulcer is still here. I read that hydrogen peroxide is good but I couldn't find any at the pharmacy or maybe they just don't understand my French. But I did come back with liquid oxygen which I tried on the ulcer. Doesn't taste bad, doesn't sting and the best part is the pain went away! I was able to sleep throughout the night . The sores are still here but I dab liquid oxygen on them when the pain starts and am pain free for a few hours at least.

On another note, I met one of the SDF people I helped a few weeks ago outside the post office - he greeted me and wished me "bonne annee". I'm glad to see him alive and well, wanted to ask him if he was warm enough but didn't want to embarass myself with my limited french. Anyway, it was nice to know that he remembers.

New Year resolution - drink more water to avoid heatiness.... wish I had some Hor Yan Ho tea...!

Lucas at 26 months

Yesterday was unseasonably warm so I decided to take Lucas out to town, to get some fresh air. Lucas is still coughing and has a cold but I bundled him up well. It was 14 degrees when we were out, and when we came home it was 16 degrees - what bliss :)

Lucas has been changing a lot since his 2nd birthday 2 months ago. I noticed that for the past couple of weeks now he's very well behaved especially when we go out.
At the doctor's recently, Lucas played with his toys quietly sitting on his stroller while waiting for the doctor. And in the doctor's office, he was babbling to the doctor, and even voluntarily climbed onto his stroller (but I suspect that's cos he really wanted to leave the doctor's office).

Yesterday we went for a walk and then adjourned to Simply Food for a croissant and some playtime for Lucas. He was cooperative, and happy - even though his new playmate didn't want to play with him. There was another couple there with an older kid (4 yrs old) whom Lucas kept trying to play with. One moment, the other kid stopped playing to eat his chocolatine at his parents' table and Lucas stood 3 feet away getting ready to launch a ball onto the kid and the table ladened with coffee drinks. I told Lucas "stop, do not throw that ball" , he looked at me and then put the ball down. That was a first!
At the post office, Lucas was patiently waiting with me even though there was a queue - normally he would have protested really loudly but not this time.

I've also noticed that Lucas is talking more clearly now, and is repeating words from me, his papa and Barney! He is also saying more french words - encore, au revoir, merci, oui and is trying to say coucher - thanks to the talking robot dog that Lucas got for Christmas.
His latest new English word is "why?"

This morning Lucas and I went to the Thurday markets and as the vendor was bidding me au revoir, Lucas repeated the same to her :)

Monday, December 28, 2009

Christmas photos

Lucas checking out the Christmas spread...










Lucas opening pressies from Santa












Playing footie with Gilles on Christmas Day









Our Tree











Turkey was YUM!!!!







So everything turned out well for our first Christmas here in France. My MIL surprised us - she gave us money to buy our own presents, and then when we turned up for Christmas Day lunch, she bought each of us a little something :) Lucas was especially happy with his new firetruck from Mamy.
On another note, Lucas is still coughing and having his cold. Last night, he woke up at 11 pm and started throwing up his phlegm. Today he started sneezing again. Methinks this cough and cold will never end, bouncing from Lucas to me and vice versa. Next year I will be sure to get us all flu shots when November comes by...

Monday, December 21, 2009

A traditional French Christmas

As this is our first Christmas in France, I thought it would be nice that we start a Christmas tradition for Lucas. It will be something constant, celebrated every year at our home and something for Lucas to look forward to even when he becomes an adult.
My MIL will host a Christmas Day lunch at her home so that Gilles can attend from Pau, and Fred & I will host Christmas Eve Dinner at our home.
In France Christmas is a time for family while the New Year is for celebrating with friends.
This year, I would have liked to have a tree, le sapin de Noël, but we opted not to have one as Lucas is at that age where he'd be tempted to pull the tree down. I can feel my resolve weakening though as we strolled through the Sunday market yesterday and there were beautiful trees on sale. Even Fred wanted to get a teeny weeny one...
We managed to buy some holly and some mistletoe to hang by the front door as the French think it brings luck throughout the year to do so. We also have the traditional Christmas Creche which is a display of a Nativity scene. The crèche is made of little clay figures called santons or "little saints". The creche depicts the event in Bethlehem, with the ox and the donkey placed close to Jesus, and Mary and Joseph in the foreground. In modern times, the figurines include everyday people of the village like the Baker, the homeless people, the priest and the Mayor.
French children put their shoes in front of the fireplace (in lieu of the Christmas sock) so that Santa ( Père Noël ) will fill the shoes with small treats and gifts. Candy, nuts and small toys will also be hung on the Christmas tree overnight for when the children wake up on Christmas Day.
The french take Santa Claus pretty seriously. In the 1960s, a law was passed that stated every letter addressed to Papa Noël will be replied. In schools, children who can write actually write letters to Santa and each of them will get a response.
My French teacher explained that the letters addressed to "Père Noël " get sent to a centralised unit in Bordeaux and each letter will be responded to with a card from Santa!
By the time I found out it was too late for us to write a letter on Lucas' behalf, but we will start doing it next year.

On the 24th, the french attend la Messe de Minuit, an important part of Christmas for many families. It is followed by a huge feast, called le Réveillon. Le Réveillon is a symbolic awakening to the meaning of Christ's birth and is the culinary high point of the season, which may be enjoyed at home or in a restaurant or café that is open all night.
While I would have liked to attend the midnight mass ( I prefer a Protestant church but can't seem to find any in my town) Lucas is not old enough to sit through the entire mass, so our Christmas dinner will start early and probably end by midnight. Normally the dinner is served after the midnight mass.

My Christmas menu for this year will be foie gras (I know my mom will be wondering why I am serving this after her lecture on how the poor goose suffers to provide us with its enlarged liver, but we were given the foie gras and since we already have it we might as well eat it right?), followed by fruits de mer (seafood platter with lobster, prawns, crabs, fresh oysters and some other shellfish that looks like "lala" and "balitung").
I wanted to serve the Chappon instead of a turkey since the turkey is so big (Chappon is between a chicken and a turkey) but maybe I will make that turkey after all and not veer from tradition.
My Christmas turkey recipe is a simple one - defrost turkey, put turkey in brine overnight, dry with paper towels. Lather inside of turkey with lemon juice and mustard. Put in yellow onions, celery, carrots, fresh parsley, cap with aluminium foil, tie legs together and the wings. Rub olive oil with pepper, add thyme and sprigs of rosemary.
The stuffing is made separately as I find that the turkey cooks more evenly without the stuffing.

I would like to buy readymade (Pepperidge Herb Stuffing if they have it) stuffing but if I cannot find any, here is my recipe :
Chestnuts, raisins, 1 green apple, walnuts, olives, mushroom, celery, onions, chicken stock, fresh parsley, salt & pepper, 1 french loaf, butter.
Toast walnuts and bread with 3 tbs butter, cook onions and celery with 3 tbs butter, add diced apples, chestnuts, raisins, olives, mushrooms, parsley with 1 cup chicken stock. Add salt and pepper.

For dessert, it is traditional to serve La bûche de Noël - Christmas log cake. I will buy an ice cream bûche and serve it with exotique fruits (its exotic here but normal for me....) - mango, lychee and pineapple.
For drinks Champagne is traditional.

Fred has reminded me to tell Lucas that all the presents are from Santa.... apparently he believed that Santa was real til he was 9 years old and still remembers what an exciting time it is for kids...

Merry Christmas everyone! Christmas dinners and traditions aside, let's celebrate the real reason for Christmas and remember that our Lord Jesus Christ was born on this day to save all mankind.

Friday, December 18, 2009

La Poste

Today I received a pack in the post from my best friend. She sent me 3 big packs of Japanese hand warmers. Like the 2 other packages that I have received this Christmas season, this pack arrived opened. I can believe it if my presents are stolen in the post in Malaysia. But this is France. Fred says that in times of crisis and also when its Christmas we should not be surprised that theft happens. When I complained about the opened packs and stuff missing I was asked to write in officially.
Anyway back to the Japanese hand warmers. The "vol" (thief) opened my pack and even opened one of the pack of handwarmers. Thank God for ignorant french people who do not speak any other language but french :) The dumbo probably couldn't figure out what it was, and couldn't read the japanese instructions or the small english label. He missed out on the precious commodity - the handwarmers are Godsent! It slowly warms up and continued to be warm until this morning! It is truly another fantastic japanese innovation.

A "difficult" baby

Yesterday Lucas didn't want to have his nap, so he went to creche a grumpy baby. When we went to pick Lucas at 5 pm, he was sleeping. His caregiver took the opportunity to speak to us as Fred was there with me. She asked nicely how things are at home with Lucas and I as she said that Lucas threw a mother of a tantrum in school when she made him come back to the play area after Lucas and the kids went to look at the little Christmas display they set up, with lights and music and moving toys. He didn't want to get back to the play area and he was screaming uncontrollably and she said it took him a long time to calm down after. She also told us that when it was tea time, he refused to sit and eat with the other kids and wanted to do his own thing. He also didn't want to sleep in the cot and had to be pushed around in his stroller til he fell asleep. Fred explained to me that the caregiver, Malika told him nicely that Lucas needs to have limits set, like the other kids in the creche.
I was rather upset to hear that she thinks that Lucas is not well behaved. Most of the time I admit that he needs to be reminded of his limits and boundaries which Fred and I try very hard to maintain. Apparently the kids in this creche do not throw awful tantrums and listen well and sit where they are supposed to.
Not that I want to make excuses for my little boy but those other kids have been in that creche since they were 6 months old, and they are at the creche full time, so they have adjusted to the schedule. Lucas joined this creche barely 4 months ago and he only attends 3 times a week, 3 hours each time.
At home when Lucas is tired he will sleep in his cot. He has never slept anywhere else besides his cot or his car seat or his stroller. I suspect that he was fearful of the new sleep area at the creche. As for his tantrums, with me his tantrums don't last even 2 minutes. While I know for a fact that we should be more strict with him, I don't think that Lucas is that bad a baby. He doesn't like to sit and eat when he's not hungry and Fred & I are still trying to teach him to sit through dinner with us in his chair.
So what am I doing wrong that my child has been labelled a naughty and a difficult one? Am I being too lenient with him? Fred and I used to bend our schedule backwards to cater to Lucas. Lucas had a maid at his beck and call in Malaysia. But although I find that Lucas needs to follow a schedule, it doesn't have to be one that is carved in stone. I no longer rush home in the middle of shopping just cos Lucas needs his nap. If he wants to sleep, he will sleep in his stroller. His crying and complaints when I am out shopping no longer terrifies me. I have learnt that I am the "boss" in this relationship and Lucas is learning to respect that fact.
I thought that Fred and I have made a lot of progress with Lucas since we moved to France. But Malika's remarks have made me doubt what I am doing. I spent last night tossing around trying to think of a solution. Short of pawning Lucas off to a supernanny for a couple of weeks to straighten him out (Fred says there is no such supernanny here in Tarbes) I don't know what else to do. Maybe spend less time with him and let someone else who is in a better position to teach him care for him, or try to find another creche which is able to take Lucas full time so he will learn through the experienced caregivers? That would defeat the purpose of me being a SAHM to Lucas.
How do I be a disciplinarian without being too rigid? What can I do to make sure Lucas adheres to his limits without breaking his spirit? What am I doing wrong here?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

SDF

Now that the temperature is dropping steadily to sub zero, I worry about the homeless people out in the streets. Where will they go to keep warm? How can they survive such harsh weather? In Tarbes, everytime I go to the Centreville, I meet the same few homeless people begging by the shops. At first I was a bit fearful of them as most of them are young with dreadlocks and tattoos, and huge dogs; but I have found that they are polite and respectful to everyone, and do not agress anyone in the streets. I always wondered why such young people do not try to get a job and get off the streets but Fred told me that in France, to get a job, you need a fixed address. The homeless people in France are known as SDF which means sans domicile fixe (without a permanent address). Its a catch 22 situation for them - without a permanent place to live they can get a job and without a job they can't afford a place to live.


A lot of the SDF people drink alcohol to keep their bodies warm, which is not good as their bodies inadvertently start freezing and they do not realize it because the alcohol numbs their senses which in turn can cause death.
Fred assures me that there are soup kitchens who will provide them with a hot meal and there are associations out there who will provide shelter. But there are some of the SDF who choose not to go to the associations and prefer to sleep in their tents with sleeping bags and their dogs who keep them warm.

So I decided that instead of sending out pretty Christmas cards this year with our photos, I will use the money to buy polaire blankets for the SDF in Tarbes.
After all, Christmas is a time for giving.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Christmas shopping

The meteo tells us that we are entering into winter this week. From tomorrow onwards the temperature will be 1 degree in the morning and will "warm" to 6 degrees after noon. Also, snow will start falling in Tarbes next week :) Its something to look forward to - if we were staying home.... but life goes on. Lucas and I will still need to go out in the cold to get to school! Next week is the last week of school tho'. I am contemplating on going out today to do my Christmas shopping before it gets too cold but I am still stuffed up with this cold of mine and Lucas, tho is feeling better is still coughing.
So this means I will only do my shopping next Thursday when I can leave Lucas in creche and know that he will be warm and I will bravely trudge out into the cold. For once, I am not looking forward to Christmas shopping!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

How to feed medication to a strong willed toddler who refuses to swallow or vomits out all the meds?

We are having trouble trying to feed meds to our 25 month old headstrong toddler. I have a feeling that his cough and cold keeps reccuring because he never finishes his antibiotics, not because we do not give him his meds but its virtually impossible to get our toddler to swallow!
I have tried to disguise his meds and slip it into his milk or food but to no avail - Lucas seems to have superior sense of smell and could somehow smell the meds even without tasting the food, refusing the food with a loud resounding "NO"! I have tried to give him his meds with a spoon instead of the medicine syringe. Still "NO"! I thought that since at this age, he may want some control and may want to feed himself, so I gave him the medical syringe and told him to do it himself - he refused to even touch the syringe and ran off instead.
I hate having to restrain him and force feed him his meds but Lucas leaves us no choice and his health is more important to us, so everyday, twice a day Fred has to hold Lucas while I try to make him open his mouth for me to put the medical syringe into his cheek pocket. Even then he refuses to swallow the meds and spits it out. Just yesterday, I made the mistake of feeding him Advil less than an hour after his milk and he promptly threw up all over me - some of the Advil went into my eye!

Last night I went on the internet to find out if other parents out there may have a secret tip or something and one parent gave this advice - blow gently on baby's face while feeding the meds to make them swallow. I tried it on Lucas (aiya, I am also down with a cold and cough but getting Lucas to take his antibiotics trumped this fact) and managed to get him to swallow most of his antibiotics and Advil. Last night, Lucas and I slept through the night AND for the first time in 25 months, I slept through until 10 am this morning! And we would not have woken up if Fred hadn't called...

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

No regrets

Its December already and Chrismas is around the corner. Time really flies. Its hard to believe that I have been unemployed for nearly 8 months now! Do I miss working? I was one of the lucky ones who enjoyed their work and got immense satisfaction out of what I was doing, so getting up in the mornings to go to work wasn't that hard. I also had really good friends at work and that made me look forward to each working day. The money wasn't too bad either :) I loved being financially independant and being able to buy whatever my heart desired without having to "consult" with my husband or feeling any guilt. I loved that I could get the best of everything for Lucas.

But we had to come to a decision about France - Fred was already over 40 and he wanted to come back before it was too late. While I loved going to work I was also lamenting about the fact that I never got to see Lucas (I used to wake up at 5 am to spend a couple of hours with Lucas before going to work as by the time I got home from work, he would either be nodding off or fast asleep). So when we came back to France for a holiday in 2008, Fred decided to bite the bullet and stay back in France to look for a job while Lucas and I flew back to KL. Fred could still do his web development long distance and we gave ourselves a deadline as to when Lucas & I will join him in France.

It was during the height of the crisis when Fred got a job offer from Toujas & Coll. A crappy job, but still, a job nonetheless and one that would put him back into the French system for social security and medical benefits. It wasn't all smooth sailing, since Fred has been away for the past 11 years in Malaysia. But finally everything has fallen in place - Lucas and I have been here since May and the only thing lacking is my permanent visa which will be awarded to me after I pass my French exam. I received my driver's license 2 weeks ago and Lucas & I no longer need to bring an attestation letter to confirm that we are covered for Medical and Pharmaceuticals.

In the past 7 months there were so many times I've been tempted to throw in the towel and move back to KL. I would weigh the pros (career, family, friends, yummy food, MAID...) and cons (quality of life, education, long working hours, maid who will make you vomit blood, massive traffic jams, have to pay for EVERYTHING that we get for free in France- medical, visa for Fred)
In the end it always comes back to one reason - Lucas.
So what if I have to forego that beautiful pair of Camper boots that I've been dreaming of, I get to dream at home with Lucas instead of being stuck at work wishing I was home with my baby.
So what if our current apartment is 3 times smaller than our apartment in KL? At least Lucas is spending time in this apartment with mama instead of the maid.
So what if we can't afford to have a maid here? Although it would be nice to have someone do all the cleaning, laundry and cooking for me (hehehehehheeh...) I would miss watching Lucas take the swiffer out of the cupboard and try to help me clean the floors.

My point is this - there are so many "what ifs" and "so whats"out there, but one thing I learnt is that everyone is adaptable, even me! It depends on your priority in life, and ours is Lucas. And we know that for Lucas, life in France will be a better one. So we learn to do without certain luxuries in life, and whaddaya know? I don't really miss it! I wake up every morning feeling so blessed and thanking God for giving us everything we need :) (and friends who send me stuff I cannot get here...)
We knew what we would have to give up when we left KL, and we migrated to France with open eyes but it was still a big shock for us and especially for me, the adjusting period has been trying. But after 7 months, I am happy and contented. Don't get me wrong, I still have my little complaints like how I still deteste driving on the wrong side but even then I am HAPPILY complaining :)
Lucas is so so happy here. I love watching him get all excited about going to creche, greeting all his caregivers, profering his cheek for a kiss, asking insistently to play outside (yes, even in the cold...). I get to be with him everyday and watch every milestone, I get to hear him sing with Barney and Tigger, count from 1 to 5, point out shapes and colors and dance to The Wiggles.
That is one life experience that cannot be replaced with all the money and all the Prada handbags in the world!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

H1N1 Vaccination - do the benefits of getting this vaccination outweigh the risks?

We received the vaccination letter for Lucas more than a week ago and so far we haven't come to a decision yet...
This topic of vaccination has been in the news for months, and because of the sudden widespread disease here in the SW where schools are closing due to the outbreak, suddenly the vaccination centers are getting filled with people waiting in line to get the injection. Previously a lot of people were reluctant to get the injection, including medical workers. A majority of people I spoke to are still uncertain about the safety of the H1N1 vaccines, and are worried about the potential side effects, especially the risk of Guillain-Barre syndrome which can cause paralysis or death in severe cases.
The most commonly reported side effects of H1N1 vaccination remain pain, redness, or swelling at the site of the injection. Headache, fever, fatigue, and muscular aches are also common, though less so, and generally go away within two days of getting the shot.

The most common worry is the risk of Guillain-Barre syndrome. Although there have been only two cases reported in France in possible connection to the vaccine, it continues to be a major concern for many, including Fred & I.

Another concern is the worry that the H1N1 vaccine may not be effective for long as mutations of H1N1 have been reported in a number of places. These mutations have not spread beyond a few individuals, and so far the vaccine has remained effective against the mutated H1N1 viruses but it still raises concern in many people that if the mutations continue and the vaccine becomes ineffective, what's the point of taking the vaccine now and exposing oneself to Guillain-Barre?

Also causing worry is the safety of the small amounts of mercury in H1N1 vaccines used as a preservative in the multi-dose formulas. Thimerosal has been found in the multi-dose vaccine and contains a form of mercury. It's ethyl mercury, which is likely not as toxic as some other forms. Even so, mercury can't be good for your body. People who want to avoid thimerosal-containing flu vaccines should get the single-syringe shots.

Last night after the news showed thousands of people lining up to get the vaccine and the start of vaccination to all school going children today nationwide in schools and colleges, Fred says that if so many people are getting vaccinated, the number of swine flu cases will decrease so there should not be a need for Lucas to get the vaccine...

Methinks the Minister of Health is under fire for over ordering the amount of vaccines paid for by the taxpayers and so needs the whole nation to take the vaccines collectively which is why there is so much hype about the number of people going for the injections. After all, people attract people right?

Would you take the vaccine? Would you give your kids the vaccine? In France we have been given the choice of saying no. Everyone is so uncertain about this vaccine, its making us stressed out just thinking about it. But for now, this is a moot point as Lucas is having a cold and a cough - we need to wait for him to recover before we come to a decision.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Money saving tips from Roni

For those of you who have been following my blog since I first arrived in France, remember when I had to go grocery shopping and I was complaining about how expensive food is in France?
Well, I have stopped converting every euro to RM since the conversion gives me a panic attack everytime but I find that for certain items I still do need to multiply by 5 (euro to RM) for me to gauge the value of things. For example, I nearly bought Lucas a wooden baby highchair (don't ask me why OK, since he doesn't even sit in his current highchair anymore...., it was an impulse thing - I saw the chair, it was aesthetically pleasing and I could imagine Lucas sitting in it, although getting him into the chair would have been a struggle but I didn't think about it at that time...)
Back to the highchair. For a moment I nearly called Fred to tell him about the chair (good thing I didn't...) and I remember telling myself that its such a good buy and so cheap at 129... but then I woke up and remembered that its 129 EUROS and not RM. That switch took more than 3 minutes tho' cos I was distracted by the chair. I was already thinking about how I was going to bring the boxed chair to the car when I realized I made a mistake.

Anyway, I wanted to share some money saving tips I picked up in my last 6 months here. Before some of you start laughing at me, FYI I am not exactly living the life of a "tai tai" here in France since "Tai-Taidom" involves full time maids, sleeping til noon and shopping everyday with the weekly mahjong session thrown in. In the first place even if we could afford a maid, where will I find 3 other tai tais to play mahjong with me????? :)

OK, here is what I learnt:

Make Grocery Lists. Plan weekly meals and take a list with you to the grocery store. Fred was drumming this into me since the first day I arrived. In KL, we didn't need to make any lists and would just buy whatever we wanted and we'd go to TMC every couple of days which is also not fuel efficient. It has been proven that people spend less money when they make and follow a list. The key word here is "follow the list". Its easy to get distracted and start dumping in other stuff that caught your eye. Both Fred & I are so easily distracted, we end up buying more and busting our monthly grocery budget. Also, do not go to the grocery when you are hungry!

Stop Eating Out! Going out to eat is expensive here in France! Of course this rule of thumb does not apply to Malaysia - how I miss the mamak stalls, the "tai chow", the hawker centers, Chili's, Marmalade and Delicious...
Even though groceries cost a lot of money, its still cheaper than eating out all the time. Also, when you cook meals at home, you can make them healthier for your family. Use leftovers to pack lunches for work. I usually cook more so we will have the same food for lunch the next day (this is also so I don't have to cook twice a day... )

Do not throw out the "publicites" just yet. Use them to familiarize yourself with which stores are having specials and which ones offer Buy One Get One Free so you can maximize savings.

Buy in Bulk. I found the fresh meat here in France expensive and after I complained about it in my blog, my aunt emailed me and taught me to buy more when they are on sale and freeze them. I have been buying pork chops from LeClerc (15-18 pieces for 9 euro) chicken breasts and fillets from Carrefour (6 pcs for 7 euro), beef steaks from either LeClerc or LIDL for under 2 euro a piece, frozen tiger prawns (LeClerc sells frozen tiger prawns from Malaysia, 30 pcs for 5 euro) - I was sceptical about the frozen prawns at first but after I tried them, they are as good as the fresh ones. Buying in bulk allows you to get a better price on food and household items.

Recycle or make your own toys! Lucas has so many toys he doesn't play with these days. He likes to go into the kitchen and play with the pots and pans instead. Start an arts & crafts session with your toddler instead of buying him a new toy. Lucas and I have started doing paper chains for our Christmas decorations. He happily shows his fruits of labor to his papa and is also more contented that I am spending more time with him.

Stop doing the laundry so much. Some pieces of clothing (jeans, jackets and sweaters) do NOT need to be washed each time you wear them, especially if they are layered over some other piece of clothing. If you are able to hang your clothes outside to dry, choose this option. Unfortunately for me I need to use the dryer everytime I do my washing. Make sure you wash FULL loads only. I remember my mom telling me that my maid was using the washer even for 3 or 4 pieces of Lucas' clothing and that really irked her.

Create & follow a monthly budget. There are internet tools available online to help you keep account of your monthly budget.

Plant your own vegetables. If you have a garden why not transform a part of the garden into your own vegetable patch? Every small change can save you money and in this case, planting your own vegetables can help you save (in my case it would be 0.75 for the lettuce - we consume 1 a day, 0.30 for 2 tomatoes, 0.50 for a cucumber, 0.70 for a green/ yellow pepper)

Do you have any other money saving tips? Feel free to add your suggestion to the list above.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

How we got our toddler to eat :)

For many many months now I have had one problem after another getting Lucas to eat solids and to try new food. Before he fell ill with bronchitis, Lucas would still eat food that I mix into his baby cereal and also pasta especially macaroni. That all changed after he got sick and even after he recovered, Lucas only wanted to eat his baby cereal mixed with mashed fruits, but only apples or pears, not bananas.
Of course then I started "labelling" him as a fussy eater and started getting worried and stressed out when he refused to even try anything new. Even when I tried to feed him with Barney switched on, he still refused to eat anything more than a bowl of cereal + fruit a day. I'd try to make food that he used to like, fried rice or pasta or soup with rice but he would take maybe 2 or 3 mouthful and refuse the rest. And I'd be begging him to eat and praying really hard for him to eat and then resorting to telling him if he doesn't eat, mama will bring him to the hospital and the doctor will put him on a drip. (I don't know if he understands but he ignores me anyway)

Then last week I was chatting online with mom and she asked me to try making fish cutlets ( I mentioned that Lucas seems to love fried foods, like the instant cucur udang that I brought with me from KL). I rushed out to buy fish (but ended up with fish fillet as I didn't know what fish to buy...), biscotte (I couldn't find breadcrumbs, so I mashed the biscotte into breadcrumbs), eggs and carrots.

When Fred came back from work that night, he had an ephiphany (while at work, I suppose...) and said that maybe I was feeding Lucas too much and he is too full to eat as I mix his full bottle of milk with 8 oz baby cereal and a tsp honey, 3 times a day - morning, noon and night as I worry he's not getting enough nutrition.
So he suggested that I stop adding the cereal and give him just milk and see if he eats after that. Well, whaddaya know? It worked like a dream! Suddenly my toddler started to eat the grilled cheese sandwich and the fish cutlets (he loves it and finished it all). I made fish cutlets 2 nights in a row and then last night we gave him chicken nuggets which he ate as well. He still rejects the scrambled eggs and pasta though but I am so happy that he's finally eating solids and chewing his food that I am no longer bothered. I am now going to add brocolli bits and spinach into his cutlets and will try minced beef and minced pork as well. I don't like the idea of Lucas eating fried foods all the time though so I will try to bake the cutlets and see if he will eat them.

Mom's recipe for fish cutlets: (Fred & I love them too!)

Minced fish (or beef/ chicken/ pork)
Breadcrumbs
Salt and Pepper
1 egg
diced onions
Bits of vegetables (corn/ carrots/ brocolli)
Mix it all in a bowl and form into patties
I like to add some milk into the mixture to make it more moist
Fry in a heated pan

Monday, November 16, 2009

Friendship foibles

Maybe I am getting old as I am beginning to find that my level of tolerance is pretty low for someone who should be trying hard to make friends instead of alienating them. But that said, I cannot and absolutely will not stand for meaness in that friend even though the remarks could have been made carelessly and without thought.
A friendship that I'd hoped would develop into a close one came to a halt recently after I went out with this person twice since we met and after getting to know her through my french class.

At first I thought I could tolerate that she has maybe low self esteem and has the need to boast ALL the time. This is one person who takes advantage of every situation in class and during break time to tell anyone within hearing distance how rich her husband is, about her 7 bedroom house and her new yacht that they bought cash as her husband doesn't like to take credit from a bank, about her 55 pairs of shoes (none of them Manolo Blahnik or Jimmy Choos or Loubotins..., I asked and she seemed clueless)and about how she has never worked a single day in her life.
She boasts of her "wonderful" life among the students some of whom are refugees and poor immigrants who cannot even afford to pay for the bus fare to come to class. So I was telling myself that maybe she is just tactless and I have tried to tell her that its not nice to boast, but she still does it.
Last week, we were learning words that describe the characteristics and qualities of a person and when the word "modeste" came and our teacher was explaining the meaning, you hear her quip "that's my husband, he so rich but he never shows it" and someone whispered "but not the wife"!!!!!

Besides that she can also be downright mean, saying our Portugese classmate is fat because she loves hamburgers (out loud, with the poor Portugese girl sitting a few seats away). When I shushed her she said again in a loud voice that the girl doesn't understand English, but I saw the expression on the poor girl's face.
Today, during the coffee break I was talking to an Armenian girl Rosanna who loves wearing skin tight clothes and found that she makes most of her clothes herself. I thought that was very clever and I inspected the stitching on her black vest and it was so well done, I happened to mention it to the meanie who immediately said "well, she's never going to make any clothes for me cos her clothes are so ugly" Rosanna's clothes are not ugly at all, she just likes to wear black - black Tshirt, black leather pants, black vest, black knee high boots...)
She also told Elizabeth off when Elizabeth asked us where she could find some cheap boots to buy (Elizabeth's husband is unemployed). She told Elizabeth that her husband always tells her to buy quality and expensive things instead of cheapies. Elizabeth and I simply ignored her comment and I advised her to go to the Sunday markets for really nice, leather boots that cost between 20 to 50 euros.

On the other hand, I like talking to Russian Margarita, the english ladies Lucy and Philippa and Luseanne and Nadine. The meanie seems possessive of our friendship and hates it when I mix with the others instead of sticking to her but honestly it doesn't bother me. During today's break she sat all by herself until Elizabeth went to join her.

So what started off as a nice friendship is about to be demoted into acquaintanceship since I realized that I really do not like her at all and I really can't get close to someone whom I dislike no matter how I long for friendship. I'd like to think that with time I will find some really good friends whom I can call up for a nice chat or have coffee together and the occassional cook out or the odd shopping spree like my friends in KL who I still miss like mad...

Friday, November 13, 2009

To spank or not to spank...

Lucas has been impossible the past 2 weeks, not only with his tantrums but he also deliberately openly defies us when we tell him not to do something or when we tell him to "stop". He starts screaming when he hears the words "No" or "stop". I know he understands us when we say "no" as he uses it on me when he doesn't want something.

Other things he does around the apartment is he takes the food I give him and throws it on the ground or he picks the food with his hand and squishes it before throwing the food, he also has been throwing his toys in anger.

I was at my wits end and was feeling tired, irritated and thoroughly frustrated with his behavior. Fred and I discussed if we should spank Lucas when he is extremely naughty and agreed that a smack on his diapered bottom should do the trick. Well, last week, Lucas got smacked almost everyday and his behavior got from bad to worst.

It seems that Lucas only misbehaves when he is in the apartment with me or his papa. His caregivers at the creche tell me he's such an angel when he's there. When Lucas is with me he wants my undivided attention ALL the time and this new clingy Lucas started when he started going to creche. I suppose he also misbehaves to get my attention, which I try to give him as much as I can but I am also trying to encourage independant play on his part which has not been fruitful until 3 days ago.

3 days ago I decided to put a stop to the spanking and had a talk with Lucas like an adult. When he woke me up in the morning, I put him in between my knees, looked him in the eye and apologized to him for the spanking and for losing my temper. I told him that I was irritated and frustrated and I didn't know how to handle his misbehavior and that spanking him was the wrong thing to do. I told Lucas that I love him and that both Fred and I do not mean to hurt his feelings and that we are happy just because we have him.
That conversation with Lucas really worked. I could see that he understood what I was saying, and he has been on his best behavior since. Today he even started to play by himself and sat in the salon reading his book for 15 minutes! Lucas still "cries" (I put the inverted commas as he cries with a lot of noise but without the tears)when I do not move fast enough for him especially when he wants me to follow him into the room or to pick him up but the cries no longer develop into full blown tantrums. He also understood today when he pulled all his books on the floor and I asked him to pick them up and put it back. He wanted me to carry him but I told him to pick up his books first and he did it, without the usual fuss.

From the very beginning even before I got pregnant I made it clear to Fred that I do not advocate corporal punishment. I believe that because I smacked Lucas on his bottom, he would have thought that if mama can do it so can he, which was why he hit me back - twice. Because children learn through parental modeling, physical punishment gives the message that hitting is an appropriate way to express feelings and to solve problems.
Such punishment also interferes with the bond between parent and child, as it is not human nature to feel loving towards someone who hurt us. The true spirit of cooperation which every parent desires can arise only through a strong bond based on mutual feelings of love and respect.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Lucas at 25 months

Lucas is coming to 25 months old. At this age, he now knows how to get out of his highchair AND his playpen, which makes life more difficult for me when I want to clean the floors without his "help". Lucas also likes to choose his shirts to wear for the day - he does that by taking any random shirt out of his drawer in the mornings. After taking the shirt out, he opens the door and runs to the salon for a dose of early morning cartoon. Wednesday mornings are his favourite as he gets to watch Mickey and friends.
Lucas also likes to do things for himself, including climbing up the TV cabinet and trying to change the DVD. He knows how to switch on the TV and switches it off when he doesn't like whatever is showing including mama & papa's TV shows...

At 25 months, Lucas is still taking afternoon naps though his naps are taken later in the day now (which makes creche on Thursday afternoons pointless, as he goes there to sleep...). He still loves his baby cereal which I mix with fruit. Lucas loves Bak Kut Teh with rice, pizza, of course(!!!), macaroni with cheese and pasta sauce. He still refuses to drink anything but milk and water and loves his Milka chocolate. Since he loves chocolate so much, we decided to but some Nutella to see if Lucas likes it. Apparently in France every child and teen eats Nutella, like its some kind of staple food.

At 25 months, Lucas still loves his "lovey"! When I tried to take it away from him a few weeks ago and told him before his 2nd birthday that he has to do without it, he started getting more attached to the pacifier than before. I tried to hide his lovey and he turned the apartment upside down looking for it. I cut off the tops of the lovey, but he knew it was "broken" and threw the broken ones away.
Fred says that its fine for Lucas to have his lovey as he is still a baby and he only gets it at nap time and at night. He says I should just relax and not try to force him to give up his lovey or rush to potty train him.
So, I thought it over and decided what does it matter at what age the child was when he stopped nursing or stopped taking a bottle? Or gave up the lovey, got potty trained, learned to walk, learned to pedal a bike, knew how to write or read or count to 100? Almost all of us turn out the same in the end!
So I am going to do just that - relax, enjoy Lucas at this age, let my baby be just that. Too many parents are trying to push their children to grow up way too fast!

I will wait until Lucas is ready to give up the pacifier on his own. How many adults do you see walking around with a pacifier in their mouth? None! Because they all decided at some point in childhood that they were ready to brave the world without it. Lucas' lovey is his comfort item. It helps him sleep and makes him feel safe. I hope everyone who reads this and is having lovey trouble will stop fighting the battle and let their kids be who they are.
Don't be in a hurry for your kids to grow up, because they'll only be babies once.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

France National TV

I am really confused with the TV programmes here in France! 2 weeks ago I was elated to find Grey's Anatomy on national TV (and in ENGLISH)! They aired 2 episodes back to back so I finally watched the part where Dr. Hahn leaves (yay, I don't like her character much anyway) and then, poof! No more Grey's Anatomy. Really frustrating for me as I cannot download anything here in France even tho' we have a current paid Limewire account! If caught downloading anything at all, there is a hefty fine and jail term!
So bye bye Grey's Anatomy, Ugly Betty, Nip/Tuck, Entourage... AND no movie or music download either so I have to rely on the nice, nice frens I have in KL sending me DVDs and updating me on the latest music!!!!!
At least I still manage to watch Desperate HW and Prison Break via M6 replay...

Monday, October 26, 2009

Daylight saving & Gilles' visit

Daylight saving started yesterday. We had to turn time back 1 hour, so I guess we guess we gained an hour. Lucas must have thought it was his lucky day, going to bed at 9 pm according to his body clock!!!!
Last night we had dinner at 6 pm as we were not used to the change in time yet, and the sun set completely at 630pm. This morning Lucas woke up at 730 am (which is actually 830 am according to our body clock)

As the apartment is so small and we have an acute lack of closet space, this morning I started to put away the summer clothes to make space for the warmer clothes. I put away shoes that I will not be wearing for the next 6 months or so, my heeled shoes are put way back in storage as I do not know if I will ever wear them again. I am so used to wearing flats now, I doubt I can walk in my 3 and 4 inch heels anymore.

Lucas & I are on "holiday" today. We decided to keep Lucas away from creche for a while since he's been sick. As for me, I am on a 2 week break for All Souls Day celebration. In France
Fetes de la Toussaint is taken seriously. The living will bring flowers to the cemetary and some drive hundreds of kms to get there. School is out for 2 weeks nationwide. Like the chinese, flowers for the cemetary here are crysanthemums as well. In France one must never give crysanthemums as presents as the flowers are only for dead people! Another flower for the cemetary is the Cyclamen. I thought this flower was so pretty and nearly bought a pot for my MIL to thank her for taking care of Lucas! Fortunately, my teacher taught us all about Fetes de la Toussaint before I could commit that faux pas!

Yesterday we had Gilles, Fred's brother over for lunch. Gilles is Fred's younger brother who is under the care of the government for his schizophrenia. He has been sick since he was 13. With his meds, Gilles leads a normal life but 3 months back, Gilles had a relapse when he stopped taking his meds and had to be committed back into the hospital. Gilles always reminds me of Shaggy in Scooby Doo as he is tall and skinny. He appeared a little unkempt and Fred wanted to cut his hair for him but Gilles refused. He'd cut his hair himself and it looked like he'd used a bowl over his head and cut the hair around it. He didn't seem too well yesterday and was not very communicative. Fred's mother is trying to get Gilles transfered to Tarbes so that she can be nearer to him. Gilles has his own apartment in Pau and is being taken care of by someone appointed by the government. But obviously that someone has not been checking up on Gilles for some time or else they would have alerted the hospitals when he stopped taking his meds. Gilles said he didn't like the woozy effect the meds had on him. We also found out later that Gilles' best friend had died in a motorbike accident a few days before he stopped taking his meds.

Lucas is now singing along with Barney, humming the right notes so I know that he's not tone deaf :) He's finishing Barney's sentences like he knows what Barney is going to say next.
Today I am going to try to feed him baked beans...

Friday, October 23, 2009

Autumn

Its the end of October already. The past week has been really cold here in Tarbes. Infact, it has started snowing in the mountains at 1800 metres. 2 days ago, I saw the snow up in the mountains in our balcony. Last week, it was 1 to 3 degrees in the morning when I went to my French class. By the time I get out of class, its warmed up to 10 degrees or so. The heating in our classroom is still not switched on, and I was relieved when I walked into class on Monday morning to find almost everyone shivering from the cold. I didn't want to be the only one who was bundled up in winter clothes and still feeling cold. The week before, I was one of the few in a winter coat and my English friend told me that at her house they haven't started up the heating yet and still have the windows open! I'm like, OMG, we started our heater 2 weeks already!!!!!

It's really deceiving that the sun is shining so brightly and then you step out and its still so frigging cold! I've had to go back into the apartment to change my clothes twice!
It was therefore a relief for me that the past couple of days the weather has warmed up - in the mornings its 6 - 8 degrees and by noon, its about 18 degrees. Both Lucas and I are getting used to dressing up for the cold, though "layering" takes some getting used to.
Lucas received a warm parka from Gap from his aunt in Seattle, and that will keep him toasty warm this winter. I have finished shopping for him, my last purchase was his flannel PJs. I bought a couple for myself too and they are nice and warm.

The leaves are finally turning red and falling from the trees. Fred says he is already looking forward to Spring. The days are getting shorter too - the sun rises around 830 and then sets by 7. Lucas has been getting up at his normal time of 7 or 730 am but I didn't realize that the sun is rising later so I kept telling him "go back to sleep baby, its still early!" since its still dark when he wakes me(previously the sun rose at 6 am). Poor thing must have been so confused :)

Now that Lucas has turned 2, he is talking more and is more interactive. Today at the doctor's he looked out the window and said "Coo Coo". I guess he learnt it at creche, since I didn't teach him that. He also now plays with his Melissa & Doug puzzles, where he matches half of the vehicles to the peg puzzles. Previously he couldn't recognize the colors and cars but now he can do it and then shows it to me, beaming happily at his achievement. His favourite word besides "no,no,no" is "again". His favourite cartoon right now is Kung Fu Panda (thanks to his Ah Yee who sent it). Lucas can now finish his milk bottle and then brings the bottle to mama to wash, he also wakes up and takes a shirt out of his drawer and brings it to mama to wear it for him. Lucas can take his shoes out of the closet when he knows we are going out and goes down the stairs holding mama's hand.

Lucas' urine test came back normal

My last post was a week ago. A lot has happened in that week. After rushing Lucas into the hospital with high fever where they did a urine test on him, we got the results back which told us that Lucas had a high level of sugar in his blood. We had to go back to the hospital to get his Xray and then bring Lucas to the family doctor with the urine results. The doctor was concerned but told me that maybe its because of Lucas' stress level that his blood sugar shot up, as he was prodded on and checked for his ears, throat, eyes, Xray, heartbeat, blood pressure - all by a total stranger in a new unfamiliar place. Furthermore he was already unwell and throwing up, he would have felt terrified at what was happening to him. He then did a quick blood test just to check Lucas' sugar level and it was normal. However, he ordered another round of urine test to make sure and that test came back as normal - Praise God! The 2nd urine test showed that Lucas has a urine infection, therefore the doctor put him back on antibiotics for the next 10 days...
2 of the most stressful things I have to do (now that I am no longer working) is taking Lucas to the doctor - he doesn't like the waiting and gets restless, then he starts acting up cos he wants to leave after seeing the doctor but mama is still talking to the doctor, so Lucas will go and play with the blinds and the doctor doesn't like that and tells mama that the blinds are fragile and please take Lucas away, but mama isn't strong enough to hold Lucas down while he's struggling and talk to the doctor at the same time....; and the 2nd thing is feeding Lucas medication. I mentioned it to the doctor this morning and he says that other mothers have managed so he doesn't see why I cannot. He says I need to exert authority but I am already holding him down to give him his meds, what more can I do? Lucas will not listen as he really doesn't want to take any kind of meds.
The doctor also told me that babies cannot say no to the foods we feed them - I was telling the doctor that Lucas is such a fussy eater and picks on his food. He says again I have to make him eat whatever I want to feed him. He doesn't tell me how to make him tho'. If my french was better I'd have told him to take Lucas for a day and then see if he can manage to get Lucas to eat whatever adult food he makes! He says Lucas can feel when I am anxious for him to eat and will take advantage of that. Sigh. I thought about that and have to concede that maybe that could be true. I need to put the same amount of enthusiasm into introducing other foods to Lucas like I did with pasta and pizza.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Lucas' fever

Thank you all for your emails. Lucas is doing OK now. His fever has broken since last night. He is still not eating much, but am drinking milk. I am mixing cereal into his milk to make sure he gets all his nutrients. Yesterday Lucas slept most of the day after he woke up at 5 a.m. My MIL came over and spent the whole day babysitting! It was a really nice surprise for both Fred & I.
Lucas is very, very manja now and is taking advantage of being sickly to insist on having his pacifier with him all day! Normally he only gets it when he goes to sleep. He is also asking for Alvin & The Chipmunks all day....

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Urgences

Yesterday Lucas was sickly and hardly ate his food, neither did he want his milk. He started to run a temperature by noon and I began to take his temp every 2 hours. I also attempted to give him paracetamol for babies but as he was struggling so much, I only managed to get him to drink a little bit. By the time Fred came back, Lucas was tired and running a temperature of 38.6 (or that was what I thought since I took his temperature via his armpit). We managed to get Lucas to take some paracetamol and put him to bed.
Lucas woke up crying at 10 pm and this time he felt really hot and I was getting scared so I asked Fred to take us to the hospital. He was reluctant as he says the hospitals here are for emergencies and not for fevers! (not like Malaysia where I can drive Lucas into Pantai Medical Center anytime 24-7) Fred wanted to put Lucas in the bath but I insisted so he drove us to the Urgences.
Lucky for us it was a quiet night, and we were attended to immediately. As we were registering Lucas, he started to throw up. When they ushered us into the room, the nurse gave Fred a rectal thermomether and told him to take Lucas temperature (I thought the nurses should be doing that...) Anyway Lucas' temp was 40 degrees and climbing. The doctor immediately gave Fred a suppository (again, isn't the nurse supposed to do that????)
Lucas had to go through some prodding and he also had a chest x-ray as the paediatrician wanted to rule out pneumonia.
Then the nurse came in with a urine pouch and again asked Fred to disinfect Lucas' groin area so she could put on the pouch for him as they wanted to do a urine test. Lucas' fever went down by 1230 am, but we were still stuck in the hospital waiting for Lucas to pee. Finally at 2 am, the doctor came and gave us a slip of paper to deliver Lucas' urine to the labs ourselves as Lucas still hasn't peed into the pouch.
After we got home and changed Lucas, as I was putting him to bed, he peed - into the pouch and it overflowed onto me. So, after changing both Lucas and I again, it was almost 3 am when we went to bed.
Lucas woke me up at 5 am this morning, vomiting on the bed with a raging fever. I had to put 2 suppositories into him, 1 for the fever and the other for his vomiting. But looking back I think the vomiting was good as he expelled a lot of phlegm.
When Fred left for work at 8, Lucas' fever was still raging on. I waited until 10 to administer another suppository and Lucas went to sleep finally.
My MIL came over when she heard Lucas was sick and offered to take the urine to the lab and go to the pharmacie for us as she didn't want Lucas to go out as he is now susceptible to all kinds of viruses, especially the H1N1.

At 2 pm, Lucas' fever was still going on strong so I put in another suppository and then at 230 I ran a lukewarm bath for him. After his bath, Lucas finished a bottle of milk - finally! He's only been drinking water til now. At 4 pm he also took some cereal :)

Tomorrow, Lucas won't be going to creche or even out anywhere. I intend to keep him indoors for the next week or so til he's fully recovered. Its scary when your baby gets sick. In KL I had doctors at my disposal anytime of the day. But here in France it doesn't seem that way tho' now I know I can insist on going to the hospital if need to.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Ginger fried rice

I was so happy to have found fresh ginger (4.50 euro a kg) at Carrefour and black sesame oil (5 euro a bottle, made in Sg) at my local asian grocery. I made ginger fried rice like my mom's and it turned out really yum! I had to guess what ingredients to put into my fried rice - soya sauce and oyster sauce plus eggs, but it tasted exactly like mom's. Even Lucas enjoyed it tho I took out the ginger slices.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

FJT & Civic formation

This morning as I left for my Civic training, I was worried about leaving Lucas behind with Roger and later with my MIL. I was rushing around straightening the apartment (when you have a toddler, there is always toys lying everywhere and food and clothes on the floor) and forgot to have breaky. It wasn't too cold when I left, but the temperature dropped by break time. I wasn't sure then if I was suffering from a hypoglycemic episode since I skipped breakfast and therefore was feeling cold but even after lunch it was freezing. In my class, I wasn't the only fool who dressed light, so most of us were huddling inside the classroom most of the day.

My Civic Formation was held in the FJT, which is a government subsidised housing. For anyone who cannot afford a place to stay, they can walk into FJT which consists of dorm rooms for a room to rent at an outrageously minimal price. I expected the FJT to be just a row of rooms like a backpacker's hotel. I was so wrong! The place is really nice! When I walked in, on my right there is a cafe with cafe macchiato at 90 cents a cup, nice comfy sofas, free magazines, wifi and best of all, a pool table! The patio opens outside to a sitting area for the inhabitants to smoke outside comfortably. On nice warm evenings they can dine al fresco there. After the patio, there is a huge garden for football games, and a rock climbing wall! I won't be surprised if there was a gym inside the building too.

We had lunch at the cafeteria - the food was damn good!!!!! For the inhabitants they pay one low price of 5 or 6 euro and they get to choose bread, 4 different types of pudding, flavored and natural yoghurt, chocolate mousse, fruit (kiwi, orange, banana, pineapple, apple), egg salad, garden salad, tuna salad, endive salad, aubergine, pasta, salmon & meat filled courgette.
I had pineapple, garden salad, aubergine, pasta and the meat filled courgette which was heavenly!

As I was not familiar with the area FJT was in, Fred drove me there before he left for work. I thought I could easily catch a bus home. When the course finished, I was shivering in my wool pullover as I waited at the bus stop with another Moroccan girl. Luckily another new friend's husband took pity on us and offered us a lift to the central bus stop. When I arrived at the stop, I noticed I was the only fool there with open toed shoes. The rest of the people were all bundled up in their leather coats and boots and had thick woolen scarfs! I contemplated going to the shops nearby to buy a nice warm scarf but didn't want to miss my bus so I stayed put. Just my luck that the agricultural convoy decided to block off the main roads for a farmers' strike.
The farmers have been on strike in France for the unfair low pricing they are getting for their produce. Milk has been poured away by the truckful in fields by milk producers as the prices they are getting for their milk has decreased while the price of milk for the public has gone up! Fruit producers have also been giving or throwing away fruits for the same reason.



Back to my civic formation - one important thing I learnt is that in France, EVERYTHING is provided for the people. Free heathcare, subsidised childcare, subsidised rent, free education, unemployment benefits, zero interest housing loans. The list goes on. And I also found out that in my region, if I get a job offer but do not have transport, the region is obligated to fund my transport - either public transport or if where I work has none, I will get a rental car - all paid for. France is truly a country for its people!

Friday, October 9, 2009

Orage a Tarbes - photos





Cepes

Cepes stir fried in olive oil and garlic - YUMMY!!!!

Showers of blessing on Lucas' 2nd birthday

Tarbes made the national news today when a huge thunderstorm hit the town yesterday at 5 pm. We were picking up Lucas at the creche (where Lucas brought mama's chocolate cupcakes with blue buttercream frosting and sprinkles for his caregivers) when the storm hit. Fred had run in before the rain became torrential and I was waiting in the car. The storm started without warning (actually, the clouds were so dark by 430 pm, it was as if it was past 8 pm already so I guess that should have been warning enough ...) and pebbles of ice started pounding at the car. Winds were really strong, the car was swaying left and right! I was really scared and contemplated running into the creche, but through the glass door, Fred told me to stay put. Later he explained that I was perfectly safe in the car as I was protected at all sides by the building.
After the storm receded, we drove back home via the center of town, which was a mistake as the roads were all flooded and there was a massive traffic jam. It felt like I was back in KL. It took us an hour to get home!

Today Lucas & I went into town and many shops were not open as the staff were cleaning up after the storm - since the shops got flooded! Even Fred's working place was flooded, according to his colleague. She said water gushed in really quick, up to her calf.

As we drove past the pizza place near our house last night Fred asked Lucas if he would like pizza for his dinner and Lucas said "yes". He also started chanting "pizza" over and over. When Fred came back into the car with the 2 boxes Lucas wanted pizza immediately in the car! We made him wait til we got home as he needed to take his antibiotics first.
For the first time, Lucas ate a couple of big slices by himself! I was surprised, he didn't pick off all the ingredients as he usually will only take the crust and cheese. This time he ate the mushrooms, tomato, red peppers and he even tried the chorizo (but I think it was too spicy for him and he spit it out).
After the pizza, Lucas blew candles on his cupcake.
Fred & I made the cupcakes the night before - but I put too much into each mould and while in the oven the cake overflowed. But it was still delicious and moist though I had to cut the cake and it didn't look as nice as I'd like. My buttercream frosting was a huge hit with Lucas and his friends at creche.

Tonight there is a huge carnival at Tarbes. We will bring Lucas there after an early dinner to look at the rides. Tomorrow is my civic training day - sigh. I have to report in at 9 am and will be stuck there the whole day til 6 pm. My MIL who was supposed to help babysit Lucas the whole day came up with another excuse again, so Roger will come and help us out in the morning. Fred will be home at noon, and then my MIL will arrive after lunch. I am disappointed that she is totally unreliable, especially when she knows I cannot miss this civic day and we have already told her about this more than a month in advance. She knows that Fred cannot take any time off work but still she makes us stress out over this.
I have already told Fred that I would prefer to move away from Tarbes if he finds a job elsewhere. We can't rely on the one person we came here to be near to, and she doesn't take advantage of the proximity to be near her grandson, so its her loss. She hasn't seen us in weeks and doesn't even ask if we are doing OK. She just sent me an sms about tomorrow and Fred had to call her. Roger, on the other hand volunteered to babysit Lucas! I bumped into him today in town and he said he is happy to do it and spend time with Lucas. My only worry is that Lucas will tire Roger out - he is after all >70 years old and is a cancer patient. Fred says that it should be fine as Roger will arrive at 830 am to stay with Lucas til noon and Fred's office is 5 minutes away if Roger needs him.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Lucas' new bed

Today I got a nice surprise when I opened my mail and found that I had won the bid for Lucas' new bed on Ebay! And it was really nice as I didn't expect to win it at all, as I bid the opening price of 69 euro. I wrongly read the time left I had to bid and thought I had 6 more days but actually it was 6 hours :)
I'm so happy to have gotten this bed (which transforms from a cot to a toddler bed) as I have been eyeing it for the past couple of months but it was retailing at 139 euro without the mattress. I was so happy to have won, I bought a mattress from the same vendor. I hope it arrives fast. This is my present to my gorgeous 2 year old boy :)

http://www.bambinoworld.fr/fr/lit-en-bois-transformable-en-pin-140-x-70-cm-j.html

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Last weekend

We were woken up by a sickly Lucas at 4 am this morning. He has bronchitis according to the doctor and has to take antibiotics for 7 days. We skipped creche and my class this morning and stayed home to rest. He wanted to drink his milk at 4 and then he played for a bit before falling into a deep sleep at 6 am, so my morning was more or less shot. Fred was grumpy at being woken up, but he went back to sleep at 5. Anyway Lucas had his first banana flavored med this morning via a syringe as he refused to drink his milk when I mixed it into his milk.
The antibiotic came in a small bottle, in powder form. When I measured out the dosage as instructed by the Pharmacist I was wondering why the bottle of med which was supposed to last at least 6 doses was already three quarter empty. Luckily Fred reread the instructions and found that we have to mix water into the bottle! I was really upset the pharmacist didn't give me the right instructions! I could have ODed my baby on the meds! (but actually even if I did mix it all into the milk, he wouldn't drink it...)

Anyway, as our regular older doctor was unavailable, we went to see the younger one who took offence when I asked him if there was another alternative to antibiotics. He got upset and told me in English "if you do not want to give him my medicine, then you can give him whatever you want!" He did print out the prescription for me anyway and shook my hand on my way out but I won't go back to him again. His dad is a much, much better doctor who explains everything to me and is a nicer person too.

Last weekend was a busy one. I tried cepes for the first time. Its a mushroom found here and is seasonal. Its also known as porcini. There is a man selling cepe by the roadside for 24.50 euro a kg. He is also selling it with girolles which is yellow mushroom cooked with cepe. We bought a little (9 euro) and Fred cooked it with olive oil and garlic. It was really yummy! If it wasn't so expensive I would eat it everyday!

We also went to Auch on Sunday to have lunch at Eric & Solange's place. Auch is an hour's drive away from Tarbes going towards Toulouse. Its a small town with historical sites and buildings. Although Auch has only 26,000 residents (Tarbes has 46,000) Auch is more "happening" compared to Tarbes. As we were there on a Sunday, the streets were deserted like many towns in South France. I guess most people spend their Sundays resting at home or outdoors in the mountains.

Eric & Solange live in a quaint 3 storey townhouse with Solange's 3 kids. For lunch Solange made tuna basil asparagus salad and raclette (as starters), roti porc (roasted pork), ratatouille and mashed potato (For Lucas). The ratatouille was heavenly! We finished off with grapes and cheese and coffee. After lunch they took us for a short drive to the Chateau de Lavardens, a 12th century fortress overlooking the picturesque countryside of Gers. The chateau was given to Antoine de Roquelaure in 1585 who proceeded to do massive renovation to the castle for his young bride. Unfortunately the reno works were never finished as Roquelaure died. This Castle is still being renovated to this day. The castle features 19 magnificent stone mosaic floors and big big windows (as the bride requested for huge windows to let the sunlight in).

Friday, October 2, 2009

5th month

Lucas & I have now been in France for 5 months. Time really flies! It seems like I'd just left Malaysia. I miss being in KL just as much, but seeing how Lucas has grown and bloomed, I realize that leaving my job (and the financial freedom that comes with it) was the right thing to do. However, leaving KL altogether... let's just say I am in a totally different life here in Tarbes. Its hard without any parental/friends support and what I had in KL, I will never get it here.
My new friend Elizabeth invited Fred & I over to her place for dinner - unfortunately we have had to turn her down as we do not go out at night anymore, since Lucas is in bed by 8 pm and we have no one to babysit. And I really do not trust any 18 year old who's looking for babysitting jobs to supplement their driving lessons. Its hard getting my MIL to help out even tho' she's retired. She's selfish with her time and asking her for a couple of hours of babysitting is like pulling teeth without novocaine. Furthermore, the last time she agreed to babysit, she flaked out the night before saying that she forgot and she made other plans!
My MIL lives a mere 10 minutes away and she doesn't bother stopping by to see her grandson. Fred has always taken Lucas on the bicycle after work to see her. Well, no more. i told Fred that if she can't be bothered to see Lucas, I do not want him bringing Lucas to her. She is able bodied, she drives around, sometimes she passes our place without stopping! Its ridiculous - this woman doesn't have her maternal streak in her at all. Even her friend Martine has offered to babysit (but since we do not know her well, we declined).
My MIL prefers to pay a total stranger 8 euro an hour to babysit her grandson than to spend time with him! Seriously, she offered when she flaked out the last time. She said, instead of her having to babysit every Thursday morning from 9-12 (as i have my class) she will pay for someone to take him.

Yesterday I didn't make it to class in the morning again, but Lucas & I had a nice morning. It was raining when we woke up so Luc & I sent Fred to work. At about 10.30, the rain stopped so I bundled Lucas in the car and drove to the Thursday market at Halle Mercadieu. I prefer the Thursday markets as there are a lot more stalls and only the Thursday market has fresh produce and food. We bought olive bread (yummy!) and roasted chicken and Vietnamese rolls, apples, fresh veges and flannel PJs (ugly colors and designs but warm....)

Next Thursday my French teacher says we will be going out for an excursion, to the new mosque (since not many people know what a mosque is...) or to the cinema. Next Thursday my little Boo's is going to be 2 years old! Fred has the day off, so will bring Lucas to the parc. I will attempt to make birthday cupcakes. On Sunday we will have a little birthday picnic for Lucas at the parc. This year won't be as "yit lau" as last year since Lucas' friends are all in KL and I have not gotten to know the mothers at the creche yet.

So, in our 5 months in Tarbes, I have now managed to drive (driving in Tarbes is really crazy - a normal 2 lane road is made into a 4 car road since both sides, cars are parked and I get really scared trying to manouver my way through), Lucas has enrolled in a creche, I have started my french lessons and I have started to make friends. We are exploring Tarbes together - I try to take a drive everyday either to the parc or to Jardin massey or to a shopping mall. Lucas has started talking - yesterday he said "au revoir". I have a feeling he will be talking more french than english in another 6 months. Lucas has also started eating normal food, though he still doesn't want any veges (I have to mix the peas and carrots into his cereal...)

I am going to attempt to wean Lucas off his pacifier.... wish me luck!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Stairs


Lucas can now climb up the staircase, but he doesn't know how to climb down yet. Now, everytime I want to go out, he starts climbing up the stairs and I end up chasing after him...

Chestnuts

I just got a phone call from my new friend Angel ;) That was the very first call I received that is not from Fred or a telemarketeer. I was pretty excited to be talking on the phone and making plans to meet for coffee with our kids.
Its a cloudy day today but I doubt it will rain. I will be meeting my friends Angel & Elizabeth in Simply Food after lunch, and then I hope to do some shopping in town.

Yesterday while Fred & Lucas were playing at the slides at the L'Ormeau playground, I picked chestnuts that have fallen from the trees in the playground. In Malaysia chestnuts are not cheap, and I was happy to be able to pick the chestnuts here for free. We came home with my bag bulging with the nuts.
As we didn't have charcoal, I decided to boil some chestnuts in salt water. After an hour, the nuts were ready to be eaten. Imagine our disappointment - the nuts were bitter! I had to throw the whole lot away.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Toddler shopping, eating and naughty corner

Today is a beautiful sunny Saturday! A bit chilly but the sun is shining so hopefully this afternoon, it will warm up enough for me to take Lucas to the playground.

Yesterday I was feeling ambitious so I took Lucas shopping - BAD, BAD idea! He lasted the drive and about 15 minutes in the mall before he started fussing and pulling at the straps, wanting to get out of the stroller. So I left empty handed, bundled Lucas into the car and took him to his favourite cafe. As the carpark was full I had to make a loop and I forgot I was in France and started to turn right on the wrong side of the road. Luckily the van coming towards me was going slow and stopped and the car behind me didn't plow into me! It all happened really fast and my heart was still beating fast when we finally parked the car and walked to the cafe.
"Simply Food" is a small cafe with outdoor seating and a play area for toddlers at the back of the cafe. The owner has thoughtfully made the place child friendly with playmats and toddler tables and chairs and a lot of toys to keep the young ones occupied while mama and papa have their meals.

Lucas hasn't been eating a lot, as he is at the stage where he just likes to taste the food, so he has only a few mouthfuls of most foods I eat and I supplement his diet with his milk and cereal. However at Simply Food, Lucas loves the 3 cheese toasted panini. I actually considered going there everyday so Lucas will eat but at 4 euro a panini, its too much to have everyday.

When I came home, I found that Baby Center has sent me another email as Lucas is now 23 months 4 weeks old and what a nice coincidence - the article was about mothers with toddlers this age who isn't able to sit still for more than a few minutes. I'm so glad to read that its perfectly normal that Lucas will not let me shop or sit down and eat quietly. Mealtimes have been hard as he will sit for a few minutes and then he starts to get out of his highchair and climbs on my lap to eat from my plate. He does that for a few minutes more and then gets antsy and starts to climb on the dining table, or he pulls me to play with him. He is getting better at using the spoon but still prefers to use his hand. Mealtimes can get really messy at this household :)

A few weeks ago, while I was on Skype with my friends in London, Kelvin & Ling Ling, I overheard Ling Ling asking her son Kieran if he wants to go to his naughty corner and I asked Kelvin if it really works. So a few days ago, I tried the 'naughty corner" on Lucas as he was throwing a mother of a tantrum. I picked him up and placed him in a corner and told him (above his screaming and kicking) to stay in his naughty corner until he calms down. It didn't work as everytime I placed him there he would just run off screaming more. But after that incident whenever he starts to misbehave, I would point to the corner and said "do you want to go to your naughty corner" he would either protest loudly or calm down! We didn't even need to really explain to Lucas what is a naughty corner - he just understands!

Yesterday I made a quick run to Carrefour for some salads, and came home with 2 kgs of grapes for 1.87 euro! What a bargain! Its grapes and pears season now, so the fruit is in abundance. Lucas doesn't seem to like grapes very much. In fact he only seems to eat pears mashed into his cereal, sometimes I add applesauce. His favourite pasta right now is macaroni - I suppose its because its small enough for him to pick up with his little fingers.

Last week, I took Lucas to the playground at L'Ormeau. I like going to this place as Lucas is allowed to run in the grass, and on a nice sunny day, the college kids are out sitting on the grass in groups, drinking beer and some playing the guitar and singing. On that particular day, there was a guy who was practising his flame throwing baton (without the fire) and Lucas was totally fascinated. He kept going near the guy when he was resting and started talking to the man in baby talk and pointing at the baton. Lucas also started chasing the rugby ball thrown by a couple of guys ( to my single friends out there who are planning to visit me - take Lucas to the park and he will chat up all the guys for you!!!!!) who were totally charmed by him and even tried to throw the ball near Lucas for him to pick up.

Lucas also grabbed a ball from another little boy and threw the ball in the boy's face. Sigh. That was so bad :( But it was a light throw tho' the other boy's mom didn't look too happy. I asked Lucas to apologize and he lightly touched the other boy's face to say sorry :)